×
Bureau of Interior Conditions
Division of Spousal & Relational Conduct
Division of Spousal & Relational Conduct
Case BIC-SRC-4781
Priority: Urgent
Spousal behavior intake form
| Complainant | Wife (self-referred) |
| Subject | Husband |
| Presenting complaint | Sneezing wrong |
| Duration | Entire marriage |
| Frequency | Every time he sneezes |
Symptom description
The sneeze is performed in two parts. The first part is a theatrical inhale lasting 2–4 seconds. The second part is a violent, full-body expulsion that has been described as "a foghorn being surprised." There is no medical basis for this volume. He was not taught this. It appears to be a choice.
Prior interventions
1. Asked nicely (no effect)
2. Asked firmly (brief escalation)
3. Demonstrated correct sneeze (subject laughed)
4. Sent article on sneeze etiquette (article was not opened)
Assessment
Chronic. Non-responsive. Likely permanent.